Sunday, February 26, 2006
bery bery bery unhappy wif some matters...nicks changing frequently showing the tempers in mi..recently doing the job is n0t bad cuz get to t0k quite alot then always t0k cock to other ppl..get to n0e yusoff n sze min...both of them not bad cuz they will understand mi or tok cock to mi abit ma...haha...feeling bored all day working only 6 hrs....maybe going to work n study when i reach poly cuz life will be bored when no 1 accompany mi for my poly life n also earning more $$ can be good to numb feelings...rite?poly poly poly...r u there waiting for mi?will i change after i went to poly?darker n darker i get, ain't there anyway not to get darker?sob sob sob wat is the meaning of sob?ain't there nth to do already?y is there millions n millions n question to ask?maybe now going to rely on my old pals already...maybe they will get the ans i wan...but n0w currently i no bastard definately cuz i ain't the person who will find an0ther stead within a year or so definately cuz i m those who r bery loyal 1...loyal craved in my mind wif different prospect...
AK,brandon n mi...brothers who maybe in verge of separation...changes occured in every1...AK change in style of himself which is trying to kill himself n shortenin his life...while brandon still remain as the same old him but this time he definately wanna ask for more...as now i m more closer to brandon than ak maybe becuz i hate ppl who smoke?i also don noe y now distance drifting apart frm ak le n is not like last time tat close to him le...only i m the most daring of them all already n they can't do anything for wat i tink...is gambling more in advantage than anyhow spend?some1 pls kill mi...now i noe where the old house really located in le...sze min told mi about her friend incident which the ghost possess the person who is able to see tat thingy...m i really out of my mind to do these kind of things?m i really too daring already?is my life really tat worthless?maybe in this whole there shld't be existence of good mankind...my reliance now depends on my own bro le...its true its true...
let time pass as bygone n let months let it be no fate for this n really no time to tink...hard work pay off to extend...earning much more than prosper...i gtg buai...
Updated@2/26/2006 09:57:00 PM
Monday, February 20, 2006
mi back again...life still remain calm like still water but eventually wat done cannot be undone...i found a job already in the cpf board de n will be entertaining ppl frm the public le...n0w not free liao but only available at thursday as i will be on leave...at other days i will be working...basically it is a 6 hrs work day...frm mon to wed will be 4pm to 10pm while at fri to sun will be at 9-4 pm lo...going back on the past life i m livin le...often my friends will be bery irritated wif mi but y m i so irritated leh?izzit i purposely make 1?m i having too much fun on them le then make them wanna hate mi more?m i really tat innocent tat i will easily get fool or trick?my friends frequent say tat my weakness is been too trustful to woman le then will let the women con...but i really tink tat there is a need to help 1 ma...i tink it is really a disadvantage to trust ger le n i really d0n n0e who to trust le...ya my buddies will always be there for mi but although they will make fun of mi but i also d0n care 1...m i really a easy prey for gers?will gers find other boyfriend when they are still wif the particular guy?if there is such case i will be bery pity for the boy cuz i hope it does not happen to mi...sometime its rather than being kept in the dark than letting the cat out of the bag...but to mi i tink tat i rather ppl not kip mi in the dark as i can take the blow 1...watever thing can be told 1 as long as is sincere...
tml i also don noe who i will be working wif...hopefully is a ger ba...hahaha...but i won't treat the ger as a spare tyre 1 n only wanna be friend only no matter is ger or boy lo...but down there i got more friends than enemies so i will definately get protected 1...haha...
is there really no more chance le ma?etc looking at the same job tat u like but they don accept u anymore becuz they have got more choices of ppl?such as tv last time employ extras to be in the show but now they would rather choose the models than the extras who maybe more plain looking...but most probably the extras will be acting more better than the models leh although they d0n really look tat "good" compare to the models...nowadays the world is really turning into more reality le...extreme makeover will be needed for ppl who tink they do not make the mark n i guess tat i shld consider...in 3 months time u will see the brand new mi n i will be as in a brand new life le...ya a life tat is new but remain as monk again...dedicated to my monkhood already unless some1 special came again lo...but i really hate to get destroyed again...alot of things mus be similar inside each other thinking then will make the most successful relationship...i tink i m really too childish to be in love n not becuz of readilness but is my tinking...can my life be projected in the film?my only best friend who will really listen to mi n my rubbish will be brandon already cuz we got common topics n will not tok craps wif each other...everything shall change n 1 day ppl will not recognise mi anymore...i d0n wanna have any friend now le...surviving on my own pace die at my own rate...DYING WILL BE CALLING MI SOON cuz i felt tat my life is going to be short term...i m not afraid of death only afraid tat there will be no 1 repecting me on my deathbed...i hope to have a 7 feet coffin wif rose petals at the side of my head n will be lying peacefully on the coffin nibble on "buddha pill" wif my face not tat black definately...
10 reason to break up:
financial difficulty
no more feeling
got other boyfriend/girlfriend outside
he or she is not up to ur standard
too ugly for u
do not understand u
do not trust u
not caring to u
age gap
too possesive towards u
ok gtg le buai...
Updated@2/20/2006 09:15:00 PM
Sunday, February 19, 2006
its a wonderful day which is also a sad week...my result come out to be quite lousy as a sense tat i nv study 1 but can get de result...no visible path can be seen n everywhere is foggy...my mind was bothered...stress indulge in my mind...absolute loneliness pacing past my heart every moment and i hope it will end as soon as possible...happiness faded in instant n trivial matters kip pestering my brain...trusting some1 who can be trusted is hard to find but is it rite to trust ppl who cannot c ur trust?its this complicated world i m living in and basically ppl freak out everytime n anywhere...love can be bitter or sweet...sometime it can turn out to be sour n i once think tat no matter wat i will try my best to make ppl happy which will also make mi happy...in these 5 years of my secondary school,i always live in loneliness n no 1 bery special had came across my heart when i met this particular ger who i met at work...she was the first i ask for relationship n when i feared the worst i would face,it turned out to be the most beautiful moment of my life...everyting went well for mi n "her" maybe but i d0n n0e y she suddenly don like mi anymore?izzit i m too bad for her or izzit she tink she don wan to be wif a beast anymore?my mind flashes again wif the devil telling mi to do things tat cannot be done but i insist to stick to my angel...though becoming back friends wld seem to be a good end but she is the first i ever felt the passion of love i nv had...or m i too absurd already?i kip tinking is there a chance for us to get together again cuz i really miss the moments tat we had been together...although it wasn't long but i hope tat i can spend more time wif her...
does $$ really tat matter?will i survive without $$ nowaday?i d0n tink so but i tink tat $$ cannot buy many things such as love...if moments can be video i will definately cherish it but it had come to an end which really make mi felt devastated...or my monkhood is coming soon?this love is definately the first i ever had but although i m a first timer i tink i didn't do a good job?if i were given another chance i will definately improve on myself...i will nv use $$ to sour ppl 1 cuz i only hope tat in a relationship there shld be happiness not becuz of the cost...my mind flashes her everytime i m in a slient mood n hope to be wif her for every moment but there will be alot of interruption...i really wish to patch back but i don wanna be hurt again...confuse and speechless i had to write it down to clear my doubts...any1 out there will help mi?i guess no1 can n i gonna be crazy old mi again doing things tat i don obey n injuring myself everytime le...i shld say most of the days le...wat is the real meanin behind the love?is there really an angel tat cross pass n uses arrows to shoot in to the couples heart or izzit our brain doing the unneccessary thinking?pls some1 enlighten mi wif all the might u can...
Updated@2/19/2006 02:40:00 PM
Thursday, February 09, 2006
hi...this is the singapore idol finalist the watermelon man is here...kidding...i join the singapore idol le then don noe when will be the audition date..results is coming out at tml le scare scare liao...going to piss in my pants le...recently alot of things happen...my classmates all targetting mi on news to spread around le...cuz maybe i m a low profile person so they wanna spy on mi lo...but honestly i feel hard to lied to ppl cuz i m always a person who cannot rebel against my consious de ma..
last 3 days i m at the FnN company doing planograming which is replaning of the positioning of the drinks n stock them up properly but mus endure the coldness of the freezer lo...yest is the fifth date i going out wif fiona n we catch a movie which is fun wif dick n jane n i tink the movie abit sucky but i like jim carrey cuz he really get himself in the movie lo...then sebas n sally also came n watch movie wif us lo...actually is all plan de so is not a coincident lo...after movie i escort fiona home n she kip on sighin...i was blur of don n0e y she sigh so she kip on saying mi ah dai lo...actually she live more near to AMK lo...make mi tink of history of some1 who will make mi boil up wif anger who comment mi on tings n all stuff...happy days wif fiona n hope tat it will always be happy lo...i tink i m always the 1 who make ppl happy 1 cuz all of my friends everytime go out wif mi will laugh de...m i bery hiliarious?if it is so i tink i can go n join comedy which is starring""kuong lim" in wonderland "..i love it man...time is passing so so so fast n friends are getting much more less less less but some r good to treasure some r not so good but a person can change to good or bad...there r bad ppl who may look good 1...although i m some1 who speak my mind but i tink i m also a bad person cuz i was rude to my parents sometime but there mus be communication definately 1 ma..
last 2 day i went to singapore sweep n buy my own soccer matches lo...feel so excited as tat was the first time i went in to buy...i feel scare cuz i scare i was rejected for being underage abit lo...but tat was the first time i went to buy my bettings lo...
so this is wat i hav to say le...no matter how is my result i will still be forward looking de...gtg buai...
Updated@2/09/2006 04:54:00 PM
Thursday, February 02, 2006
hihi...long time no c...today i go out wif fiona n firstly we go to ice skate there...tat was the first time she go for ice skating lo then i was bery surprise tat she don n0e where is lot 1 too...maybe she indeed live too far frm west side le...but maybe she is really a "sam pa lao"..haha...but today is i tink the first time going out wif her lo...quite fun actually but pls d0n feel bad for mi cuz i also hope tat fiona will like to go out wif mi next time wat rite?d0n mind about h0w much i spend lo cuz i tink its worth it 1 la...firstly when i was walking to jurong centre,i saw ak n muff then bery "stun" although i had expect to meet some1 whom i knew there lo...then she at ice skate she gai kiang d0n wan to wear socks then got herself blister lo...then i also need to get her socks...at there she first get herself hands on ice skatin then she say bery difficult but i tink still ok la only tat she is lack of confident ...then kip on helding on to her hands n hope to catch her if she fell but in he end she fell 5 times n 3 time she make mi fell down wif her de...first fall is my mistake for n0t holding her properly n she even hit her head on the floor lo...my friends all come down n watch "show" lo n then make mi malu but too bad i won't de...then we go off at 4pm like tat n we go to watch memoirs of geisha at lot 1 n then i saw guang rong my ex senior lo...n also saw some of my sec friends lo...then go comic collection there n find mark lo...ten we go eat le n i had to go homewif her lo...walau then no 1 entertain mi at mrt de lo...some1 say mus the boy be automatic de but y can't the ger be abit more automatic?then my friends call mi n tok to mi lo...then go home le n reach home at bout 1040 like tat...hope to go out wif her next time lo if she is free de hua...but if she give mi a date on which day de hua then i can plan to bring her go a lot of places le...cuz in singapore there r still a lot of places to visit de lo...jus hope tat she will be happy being wif mi for going out wif mi lo...although i always speak make ppl laugh but h0w come she love to laugh so soso much 1...
yest on 31 jan i went to my "gan pa" funeral as he died at 29 of jan which is on lunar new year de sec day lo...he died peacefully as i tink he will be fine de..although i n0t tat close to him but i also feel abit of heartbroken lo...but i had already calm down le...then at night i went out wif fiona to watch firework at marina lo..then she got 1 time tell mi close my eyes don n0e for wat then i blink for her to c lo...haha...then go there n the drinks is damn expensive which can make mi cough out blood...the can drink $2 for 1 lo...mineral water also cost $2 lo...wat a blood sucker "pasar malam"then sent fiona home i mean to her bus stop there lo...then i miss my last train n had to take cab home...firstly my hp no batt n secondly i n0t enuff $$ le...then i go cineleisure to withdraw my money n take cab again lo cuz i tot got NR 8 wat...but don hav so mus take cab home le lo...
lunar new year i go to my god mum house there to take hong bao n go to my grandpa house take also...then go to great-grandma house to take lo but all my mother's side 1...then at there they ask mi to gamble but i refuse cuz i really quit gambling le lo...
on the second of lunar new year,i went to my "da bo" house there n take hong bao lo...then after tat go marina there to watch firework lo...everyday frm chu 1 to 15 got firework frm 930 to 940 like tat lo...
i will blog next time n only the main thing i wish to blog n others i don wish to de...haha...buai...
Updated@2/02/2006 12:18:00 AM
